NBA Finals 1996 Game Three: Bulls at Seattle (Pt. 4)

 

 

Short of catastrophic injuries, the Chicago Bulls are not losing a 24-point halftime lead, though Seattle promises to make it interesting. "Are they confident or are they destroyed? Do they have enough left to get back in this game?" Hannah Storm asks Sonics coach Karl. She deadpans the questions and is unintentionally hilarious.

 

"I think you're gonna see us fight," says Karl, who has the stunned look of someone who has just stepped on a nail. Even he doesn't sound convinced.

 

Maybe Coach just knows he and the Sonics are the sideshow, anyway. I mean it's Jordan and Rodman, and that is just the main dish on this traveling circus called a basketball team. MJ and the Worm are like a Batman/Superman team-up: it's not a good match on paper, the approaches are so different... but they're both too strong-willed and savvy to fail.

 

 

*

 

Naturally, Dennis Rodman is the halftime attraction, in an interview with Jim Gray hours after Rodman's Game Two 20-rebound domination. Gray is famous for things like accosting Pete Rose during a Rose appearance at the '99 World Series. Jim Gray tries awfully hard to appear as a serious journalist, but it's hard to know what to think of him, because we can't figure his angle. Is he trying to sock it to those he sees as bad guys in the sports world? Does he see himself as "hard-hitting"?

 

Gray was "removed" from the Golf Channel in 2013, after a screaming match with a caddie. Can certain journalists make themselves too much of a story? Yahoo! Sports wrote. Gray has been around the block a long time, but when you're getting in multiple arguments with people in the games you're reporting, you really are becoming a nuisance, and nobody wants to deal with those types of people.

 

*

 

To no one's surprise, Rodman is mysterious, obtuse, and nearly incoherent. When he was invited into North Korea seventeen years later, the mainstream media spent more than a week smirking... dissecting why Rodman is a know-nothing on foreign policy. (NO..!) They could have just said that in five minutes. But no show, no commercials, thus no money.

 

"Was the rest of this simply designed as a marketing aspect?" Gray says at one point.

 

Rodman says, "You don't market  stuff like this... the only reason people like this is because of who I am. I'm a basketball player."

 

*

 

Gray, on Rodman's flamboyant image: Can you explain the phenomenon that you've become?... Kids emulating you, changing the color of their hair...

Rodman: They see it as entertainment... Wow, that's the guy with the red hair! The chameleon. That should be my new name. The Chameleon...

Gray: Not the Worm.

Rodman: Not the Worm. The Chameleon. Kids relate to that. It's fun. It's not dangerous to anybody. And kids... can feed off of it.

Is this mockery or sincere? You get one guess which.

Gray: But aren't you concerned it could send the wrong message?

Rodman: It's not sending the wrong message because that's what's family's all about. They can deliver the message: That guy's got funny-looking hair. But he's a good guy. He's a good guy.

 

Chameleon is a perfect name, because he is doing something dangerous indeed. He's posing as innocent, fun-loving, but introducing mixed messages to children who are his fans. The 1996 Rodman is ahead of his time in gender-bending and outrageous antics designed for maximum publicity. Not dangerous? Who's fooling who? Many entertainers have loosely followed his envelope-pushing template since, including Eminem. Rodman himself admittedly learned much at the feet of the Christ-rejecting Madonna.

 

"He's a good guy even though he (fill-in-the-blank)" can go too far. Rodman's I love the kids! act might be genuine, but it also serves as the young ones' indoctrination into accepting almost anything. Remember his words: They only like this because of who I am. Delivery system through a talented and popular person--any propaganda works with that method. And those 1996 kiddie fans are parents in 2013...

 

*

 

Gray: Are you happy with yourself and what you've become?

Rodman, stuttering at first: I'm happy... in the sense where I know I can control everything around me now. I know I can provide entertainment for myself... I know the value of life, the value of people. And things that's gonna happen before and after...

 

"I'm not saying Rodman's... overconfident," says Peter Vescey after the interview, "but he's already getting his navel measured for a ring."

 

Read more about the game here.

NBA Finals 1996 Game Three: Bulls at Sonics (Pt. 3)

With about eight minutes left until haltime, the Bulls still lead by 16. NBC flashes a graphic: Seattle Sonics Finals: 41 assists, 43 turnovers.

 

"Not enough ball movement," says commentator Matty Guokas. Bill Walton also keeps noting how Seattle's offense is basically "throw the ball up" while the Bulls "just keep moving and passing the ball. An accurate assessment.

 

*

 

We see a commercial for Dark Skies, a short-lived NBC show about aliens. Predictive programming has been around for a long time and in 1996 the aliens were still strong in the public consciousness. Then Harry Potter and vampires kinda took over for a while. But there are a lot of lights in the night sky these days.

 

Pastor Dave writes: By very definition, God is an alien, i.e., outside the earth. So many people are desperate to find alien life, listening for sounds from space, watching the night sky; yet they ignore the Bible, an inspired and precious Book given to us by our Creator—a self-proclaimed Supreme Being Who loves us, and has a purpose for our life and future. Evolutionists have one plan for your future... DEATH.

 

It is so ironic that many people today openly entertain the possibility of alien life forms in other solar systems and galaxies; while simultaneously denying the God of the Bible.

 

And where did man's spirit come from in the evolutionary  process if such a process exists? Why do animals not have spirits that seek after God, knowing evil from good? Man's moral aspects are proof of a Supreme moral Being Who created man upright, but sin ruined everything.

 

Ecclesiastes 7:20 and 29, “For there is not a just man upon earth, that doeth good, and sinneth not. ... Lo, this only have I found, that God hath made man upright; but they have sought out many inventions.”

 

*

 

Detlef Schrempf is waking up for the Sonics. Toni Kukoc and Luc Longley are solid on Chicago's side. Other than Jordan, they are playing the best for the Bulls. The international factor has arrived in the NBA Finals. I imagine Kukoc and Schrempf meeting secretly in a Seattle restaurant, chuckling about "stupid Americans" over cups of espresso.

 

 

Shawn Kemp, meanwhile, has made one field goal as halftime nears. He has three fouls.

 

The Sonics watch Jordan turnover, or "miscue" in Marv Albert's description a couple of times. Schrempf and Gary Payton settle in. Key Arena in Seattle starts buzzing--the crowd was stunned into silence by the Bulls' big first quarter--and everyone is poised for a Sonic burst. But it's still 45-31 with 4:45 in the second.

 

Dennis Rodman already has a technical; he got it early in the second for "throwing up his hands and waving" at the official, after a difficult foul call. But Rodman is just getting warm; when  the easily-agitated Frank Brickowski checks in, the Worm immediately tangles with Brick.

 

Pretty soon, Brickowski has two fouls and is back on the bench.

 

Brickowski reminds me of someone who would beat up his sister's boyfriend if the creep made her cry.

*

 

Jordan senses the momentum wavering and promptly scores the next four field goals for the Bulls. The lead fattens back up to 21. This is one of the shots he made, in crude time lapse:

 

Jordan is incorporating this into his game in anticipation of a go-to move as he ages Anyone who plays basketball knows how difficult this shot is. If not, he should go and try it on an empty court. Wow. It's a hanging fadeaway from the free throw line, and he's basically sitting down as it releases. It's nearly unblockable. I call it the rocking chair. No one else does.

 

Later, Guokas watches Jordan sprint for a long pass and says, "He would have been a pretty good wide receiver."

 

Walton: "Don't encourage him, Matt."

 

Halftime score: 62-38. Jordan has 27.

 

Read more about the game here.

NBA Finals 1996 Game Three: Bulls at Sonics (Pt. 2)

 

 

In the pregame courtside chat, Hannah Storm basically says "Seattle wants to keep Shawn Kemp away from Dennis Rodman." This is just before a boxing ring announcer walks out in a white jacket, asking the crowd Are you ready... are you ready to rumbllllle... Well, yes. They are.

 

 

*

 

Mike Jordan guards Gary "The Glove" Payton early in the game. Sports fan amnesia has put him on the underrated list. But in 1996 Payton is an elite NBA player, one of the best one-on-one defenders out there. A precursor to Chris Paul, who can score thirty but would rather collect ten assists. Like everyone who tries to psych out Jordan, Payton is finally demoralized by the results.

 

Think of all the contenders who, at one time, were thrown up to MJ. Clyde Drexler, Dominique Wilkins and Penny Hardaway, for instance. Even second-tier players like John Starks were briefly put in the conversation, especially if they were having a career year or had played well against Jordan himself . Oh, he's just as good as Air Jordan. Wait, he's BETTER than Jordan! MJ ain't even that good!

 

Then, if the question was still alive the next time that contention came to a head-to-head, Jordan would put the guy away. Particularly when things really counted. Jordan's will and determination was always in the red... we've never seen that kind of mindset from an athlete, not in my lifetime. 

That didn't always happen, of course. He didn't always come through. But it did happen plenty of times. Many of those in the playoffs, in the most pressure-packed moments. When it didn't, when MJ came up short, we were almost surprised. What?? He MISSED?

 

Sure, there is a myth to Jordan's career already. But that's true of every public figure, ever. Today your legacy is being written a week before you live it. Just ask LeBron.

 

 

 

*

 

Payton drains an early jumper over Jordan, but Seattle is ice-cold. Bulls to an 11-2 advantage. Then it's 19-4. And then 34-16 as the first quarter ends. "The Bulls are just eating up the Sonics," said NBC's Marv Albert. Toni Kukoc and Luc Longley are showing off, executing in a relaxed way, as if they are playing a scrimmage.

Hey, look who's at the game: It's musician Kenny G.

 

On the other end, the Sonics are throwing the basketball five feet over teammates' outstretched hands, dribbling sloppily, etc. Hershey Hawkins and Detlef Schrempf are usually a joy to watch, but not today, not so far. Kemp is constantly agitating his tongue which is code for, I don't know what's happening, and I'm not very happy about it.

 

*

 

We might believe that George Karl likes the idea of Chicago bench players outdueling his entire team. Maybe if Coach weren't involved with this game, he would be. On Pardon the Interruption's April 19, 2013 edition, Karl made a case for the "no big stars" team... the sort of team he happened to be coaching into the playoffs in the form of the streaky Denver Nuggets.

Tony Kornheiser (13:00 mark): It's a really nice team, but because it doesn't have a great star that it can depend on, it may be doomed in the playoffs... What is your answer to that charge?
George Karl: Basketball is a team sport. Those stars are important to their teams but sometimes those teams are built upon that star having too much responsibility... It's a new philosophy in the NBA. And I think more people should try it. How many great players are there in the league?... You're saying, you need a star to make a great team; I say, get a good team and you'll make a star.

 

Nice try, Coach Karl. But I will take a 9-10 level player and four 6s and 7s... over five 7s and 8s.

We get it: The coach's job is normally to take his team's side against the world. If Karl walked out there with five guys who looked like Sherman Hemsley, he would say that ball players under five-foot-six are the best. No doubt about it.

 

You think he would take the '96 Kemp or Payton (major stars) on the '13 Nuggets? Believe that, though he'd never admit it. He would trade any one of the current Nuggs. Every knowledgable fan would, save the instigator types...

Read more about the game here.

NBA Finals 1996 Game Three: Bulls at Sonics (Pt. 1)

Well, I was feeling nostalgic and dug through my dusty VHS collection of NBA games. Since the tapes will eventually disintegrate, and there are no plans to convert all of them to DVD or digital... this blog is the next best thing.

The Seattle Sonics (64–18 during the regular season) hosted the Chicago Bulls (72–10) in Game Three of the 1996 Finals. This was one of Chicago's most historic seasons--they broke the regular season mark for wins, and only lost three more games, two of them in this championship series.

*

In my memory, the title was Michael Jordan's from the moment the playoffs began. Really, most people felt that way from opening night in 1995, but you never know what with injuries and all.

Shawn Kemp admits in the pregame interview with Peter Vescey that the plane trip back from Chicago, down 2-0, was "a little bit quiet." Kemp and a few others on the Sonics squad have let Dennis Rodman, aka the Worm, get into their heads a bit. Plus, the Bulls are just better.

People clowned Greg Oden because he was 18 years old and looked like somebody's grandfather. Kemp was ahead of his time. They just have distinguished, old-school faces. Speaking of older, Vescey complimented Kemp, noting that his early career immaturity seemed to have faded a bit.

Why is it always that people react to the Bulls instead of having them react to their team? Why aren't you the same team that you were against the Rockets, attacking defensively? Vescey asked Kemp. The Sonics swept Houston, last year's champs.

"You have a Michael, you have a Scottie (Pippen), and they're aggressive. They're always attacking, always taking it to the rim... keeping you on your heels... teams have a tendency to lose their confidence."
 

*



Just before tipoff, Miller Lite tells us that Life is Good (when you're drinking our beer!) The POV man in the commercial transforms his world by "pounding" a beer bottle on the table.

 

In reality, 11,873 fatal accidents were recorded the year of 1996 "where at least one driver had a blood-alcohol content of at least 0.08%." But Life is Good... Thirsty yet?





*

 

Am laughing at the pregame introductions, because the Bulls are run out onto the court first... then when the Sonics come out, the Key Arena lighting doesn't seem to be quite as good as it was for MJ n' them, the TV production not as crisp and focused.

Luc Longley

Michael Jordan



Gary Payton



Earvin Johnson
 

George Karl

 It's almost like the NBA admin knows where the bread is buttered.

 

*

The Sonics are 44-5 at home going into this game, including playoffs. One of those wins was against the Bulls, early in the season--one of Chicago's ten losses on the season.

 

Ahmad Rashad, long teased for being one of Jordan's media go-to guys, says that the chance of going up 3-0 in the series is motivation for MJ to have a "statement game"...
 

Read more about this game here.

Anything You Can Do, I Can Do Better: Women in the NBA

There is a buzz about Baylor University hoops superstar Brittney Griner playing in the NBA. A few souls watched her dominate other women in college, and have concluded that she is transcendent enough to play with the best basketball players on the planet.

 

All us gym rats and weekend sports warriors have encountered the random woman who can (and wants to) hang with the fellas in a game of hoops, but Griner in the pros? In the words of a friend, "You're stretchin' it there, buddy." Dallas Maverick owner Mark Cuban tweeted that he might consider taking her in the 2013 NBA Draft. If he is not joking, I agree with UConn women's coach Geno Auriemma, who said Cuban's credibility would take a hit from such a move.

Auriemma is being very tactful. To be blunt, this idea belongs in the same trash heap as the idea that a terrific college team could beat a bad pro team.

Every few years, people see a great university squad and start speculating on this. The UNLV Runnin' Rebels of the early 1990s were one team that fit into such a conversation. Who knows? The Rebs might have beaten the worst team in the pros in a one-shot, what-just-happened scenario.

But realistically, the pros are more conditioned and stronger; they play almost three times as many games per season. Also, they are more likely to see games as a business, a job, while college-age young men are notorious for emotional ups and downs. These factors would make a huge difference. A college team beating a pro team almost certainly wouldn't happen in a game the pros took seriously, and even less likely is a successful Griner NBA career.

Yes, Griner is very tall and athletic and can dunk from a standstill. But that's not enough. There are thousands of tall and athletic men who would be humiliated on a professional basketball court. No one is grabbing 6-6 guys off of your local gym court, or off of the sidewalk during lunch hour. Why? Because they don't belong in the "L" either. And we aren't even talking about the other thousands of men who played major college ball, who didn't quite make it.

Even seriously discussing this feels silly. One host of a show called SportsNation, which is yet another sports opinion show (the gimmick: they also displays viewer polls in real time), was doggedly trying to get Griner into the NBA door. Couldn't she at least play in the summer league... and we'll see what's what? Oh you know you guys out there would watch it! She could school YOU, buddy! Sister, you deserve a chance!

Are we so politically correct that we can't just admit this idea is ridiculous? Is it sexist to say so? She plays ball for a living; of course she would make the average 9 to 5 dude (like me) look silly. I'd make her look inept at jobs I've worked... so? And is the fact that "people would watch" a good reason? People watch shows like Toddlers and Tiaras, Love & Hip Hop, and Buckwild, too. People watch fistfights, dogfights, and the aftermath of auto accidents. These are two stubbornly dumb reasons to set out for consumption.

If the NBA players were able to set aside the whole circus atmosphere of such a scenario, and were seriously competing (i.e., playing for their paychecks and jobs), Griner would certainly be humiliated and outclassed. (I can just imagine the clown grins and browbeating that media would give the pros before such a game. Don't play too rough with your little sister! Let her score!) People who think otherwise are either kidding themselves, or haven't really watched a lot of basketball across all levels. Basketball is not a bunch of guys gliding around in gentle ways, taking open jump shots. It is a contact sport.

Yet talking heads and feminists are obnoxious in insisting she should have a chance to run with the big dogs. Obnoxious might be too kind--you might even use the word "sick."

Just watch the top women teams in the NCAA play--the top teams, now. Check out how starters for ranked colleges routinely do "oh God, I'm in the heat of battle, watch me get frazzled to pieces" things that you see in any Saturday morning fifth-grade city league game. It is why you see multiple forty-point blowouts in the women's regular season and tournament every year. For every Skylar Diggins or Elena Delle Donne, there are a hundred relatively uncoordinated young ladies who appear to have made the team by default. That's the issue with women's basketball--there are not enough players on the top tier. Maybe never will be.

After a few minutes of the NCAA women, watch any men's game. It's not just about jumping higher and dunking. Overall, the guys are running faster, getting started running more quickly, and decision-making more efficiently. It's not debatable. Even their passes are almost always sharper, stronger, more accurate.

Griner may be better than all of those other women. One can imagine the crowd roaring as she hits the occasional open jumper or backdoor dunk, versus men ten years her senior and three times as strong. But she is 6-8 with relatively sluggish feet, and weighs anywhere from fifty to one hundred pounds less than men of comparable position in the pros. Added to the stronger, quicker, faster attributes, there is simply little chance for her to succeed. It becomes a fun topic for about ten minutes. Yet the stubbornly dumb will call it a success if she scores a couple baskets.

These observations are not putting females down; they're not insults. They are facts. Why can't we just enjoy the women's game for what it is? Why do we have to bait arguments and fit square pegs into round holes? Are we really talking about this? Oh, you don't think a woman could...? Do I think Griner could guard LeBron James (or any competent NBA forward)? Um, no! And the answer, "Well, no one can guard him" is a terrible rebuttal. With that logic, I want to fight Manny Pacquiao and collect that massive check. After all, pretty much no one in the world can beat Pacquiao in a boxing match, right? And I think I can land a few punches. So I deserve that opportunity.

Jackie McMullan, long-time Boston journalist, said on an April 2013 episode of ESPN's Around the Horn that Griner wouldn't make it in the pros. "But it doesn't matter," McMullan said perceptively. It should be enough that Griner is a historical great in the women's game, and that she will be a standout in the WNBA and Olympics. Leave it at that.

College Basketball Is Weak. Just Admit It

Indiana junior Victor Oladipo

As the 2013 NCAA Tournament approaches, the basketball observer is splashed with weekly excitement when a ranked team goes down to a "lesser" squad. This week, #3 Duke and #1 Indiana lost, which will send second-ranked Gonzaga to the top.

But how much of an upset are these? Not as much as in years past. One analyst believes that almost a third of the field could win it all this season, given the right circumstances and tournament draw. It's a good line, but we'll never know.

For years, college basketball has been watered-down for at least two related reasons: 1) the most talented leave for the NBA after one or two seasons; 2) and almost everyone's in love with the highlight clip. On the sports clip shows, you rarely see anything more than dunks, playground-type sequences (no-look passes, for example), public displays of aggression, celebrations and such. 

Maybe there is no room in the clip show for anything but quick hits. People watch Sportscenter because it's something that can be consumed with no effort. It's not the time for real analysis. Since the show is the first source for most sports fans, that is good and bad news. Volume on or off, multitasking while waiting for that one score to scroll by... it is background music for most American men.

The best athletes in college ball seem elite at a glance, but they are feasting on weaker competition. The ball players who stay through their senior year seem to get swallowed up in the pros. They were twelve-year-olds, gotten too used to besting second graders. There are a few exceptions.

The NBA suffers from this domino effect, too. They deserve it, though, because they've used college as a minor league. Plus, the professional league bought into the "name on the back of the jersey is more important than the one on the front" star-making machine. This machine worked efficiently for commissioner David Stern and the owners--the NBA is now truly global.

All of the look-at-me highlight reels have affected an entire generation of fans and players, which in turn decreased attention to fundamentals, respect for the game and the opponent, and basic team play on every level. It's not the NBA's fault, really. The first sentence of this paragraph is the way of the world, of which basketball is only a sliver.

Some people pretend every year that this team or that player is transcendently talented. In the 2012-13 season, the Big Ten is being touted as one of the deepest conferences ever. Talking head Michael Wilbon has been riding the Big Ten like a fox hunter, to eye-rolling levels. Almost no one except sports geeks even knows who won it all ten years ago, much less the historical significance of today's game.

Hype machines like Magic Johnson and Dick Vitale are calling Indiana senior Victor Oladipo a Michael Jordan/Dwyane Wade-strata player. There are a few late bloomers who suddenly explode to mega-talent heights. But it's more likely that if Oladipo really had the stuff, he would be gone already.

Beware of this "deep conference" talk in the modern era. The same thing happened a few years ago when the Big East got all of those teams into the Big Dance. People went nuts because half of the teams were ranked. A few were bamboozled into thinking that there might be an all-Big East Final Four.

Most of the teams were out by the second week of the tournament.

Super Bowl 2013: Predictions and Notes

Running tab of the big game:

PRE-GAME
First take: Ravens 31, 49ers 27. 

The experts seem to be picking San Fran based on overall talent. A few took Baltimore because of the emotive factor: Ray Lewis is playing his last game and the team has rallied behind him since his retirement announcement before the playoffs. I think the talent difference is overplayed on this stage. So is the 'win one for the Gip' stuff.

I tend to support people who are viciously, over-the-top hated, so I've got to admit that I'm rooting for Lewis a bit. Felt the same about LeBron James after the Cleveland exit, Terrell Owens being constantly blasted for his eccentric diva persona though he's never been in trouble or accused of PED use, etc. Self-righteousness stinks like roadkill.

Colin Kaepernick is cool and collected, but he's very young, and up against one of three Joe Cools in league history: Flacco. (Namath and Montana are the others, of course.) I think that will be the difference. Barely.

 

1ST Q

"Good drama would be kap gets hurt and smith comes and plays a strong game" says a text from my brother. Love that idea.

 

RayRay misses a couple of early open-field tackles and looked very slow. (ETA: He was pretty much at three-quarters speed of the other 21 players all game long.) Kinda deadens the whole PED thing, but the eye test is no proof when it comes to enhancers. I don't care what Bill Simmons says about before-and-after heads of athletes.

GoDaddy's shill Danica Patrick features model Bar Refaeli  and "Walter" trading spit in an irrelevant exercise. Refaeli must have needed a check badly. Can't even think of a good insult for this tripe. But then: It is GoDaddy.Their specialty is pushing out soft porn ads that have nothing to do with buying a web domain. Nothing to see here.

2ND Q

Back to back commercials with the usual agenda. Cross-dressing men eating Doritos...

...and then homoerotic Calvin Klein models. CK has always been mainstream porno.










Raven tight end Pitta catches a touchdown to put Baltimore up 14-3. I have a feeling that the Ravens better get a two or three-score lead... San Fran is a team that can be beat if they're up a bit. But if they're down in the fourth, they get all berserker (like their coach Jim Harbaugh) and score three times over the opponents' stupid prevent D.

Hyundai has an ad about every six commercials. None of them memorable; they're trying too hard. They must have spent their entire '13 budget; we'll see these spots all year.

"It's been chippy from the start," to paraphrase the CBS commentators. An on-the-field brawl after Ed Reed picked Kap off bring it to a head. That was the S.F. QB's first big mistake in his short and moist pro career... interesting to see how he reacts.

Kap has indeed looked just a tad hesitant after his high-stakes INT. Just a tad but enough to throw his timing off... then comes Flacco's TD pass to Jacoby Jones, where Jones burned Culliver twice. Been a while since I've seen a juke that good. Barry Sanders is smiling somewhere.

"Jim Harbaugh is going to eat the face off of a bench player to scare his team into playing better," I text my brother. Halftime score: 21-6.

HALFTIME SHOW

When Beyonce is involved, we are probably gonna see some satanic imagery. Remember last year's show with Madonna, Nicki Minaj and company--Baphomet worshippers galore. That was clearly a satanic ritual. Those who scoff at that simply are uninformed and have no idea what they are looking at. When we don't know something, we should find out about it.

Watch any of Beyonce's recent videos and know she is down with the beast, too. And no way will the agents of the prince of lies allow 100 million-plus viewers to avoid these symbols and sick agendas. No larger audience all year long. Can't-miss opportunity.

Twenty minutes later: More informed people than me will break this down. But first impressions reveal the usual homage to the enemy of mankind. Pyramid hand gestures and light shows... total absence of men and overwhelming feminine energy... nothing new here.

3RD Q
Not long after Jones' 109-yard kickoff return, most of the Superdome lights goes dark for a half-hour. (ETA: the official count was later changed to 108 yards.) Baltimore is up 28-6. The delay is obviously going to hurt the Ravens more, as they had ridiculously nice momenturm. Accident? Or conspiracy to prevent a total blowout game? It will be asked after this game. A conspiracy is simply a secret plan by two or more people, but that word makes "intelligent" people into mockers.

Paraphrasing commentator Phil Simms: The Ravens do a good collective job of keeping Kap from breaking a big one. It's been strange to see so many teams let him take the same angles toward the sidelines for 20-yard runs. Will be a lot of film on him... and Russell Wilson, Andrew Luck, and Robert Griffin III too, of course. Defenses will catch up to these guys. At least as much as the league will allow.

As expected: Kap leads the Niners downfield, Michael Crabtree catches the TD, and the game has totally changed. It looks like the Ravens are going to fold faster than Superman on laundry day, to quote Bart Simpson. Ravens, 28-13, with 7:20 left in the quarter. I see the score being very close early in the fourth... Baltimore is taking their foot off the gas; the lights-out garbage was just in time for the Niners. So predictable.

Deion Sanders' "Leon Sandcastle" commercial is the only ad to get a positive reaction out of me so far. A forty-something rookie dominating the NFL combine... I like it. Every other commercial, as mentioned earlier, seems to be trying too hard. I guess if I paid hundreds of thousands per minute, I would sweat about making an impact too.

The Ravens are clinging to a 28-23 lead.

4TH Q

Still up 31-29 with under ten minutes to go, the Ravens have allowed 23 points in 12:00 of game time. They look totally shaken--or shook, as the rappers use to say. The first half fire is long gone. And I'll be surprised if Baltimore wins what looked like a sure thing not that long ago. Wow.

Fourth down, 1:49 to go, Kap in trouble, he floats a ball over Crabtree's head out of bound. What a thriller. Jim Harbaugh is crying about holding but 1) Crab was grabby too, and 2) the ball was out of bounds. It was uncatchable, even with a lay-out, fingertip catch, toe-dragging effort. A ref throws a flag in that situation, he should be fired. No ref threw. Ravens up, 34-29.

Baltimore runs three times and takes an intentional safety. San Fran didn't seem to see it coming and 8 of the last 12 seconds slip away before they push the punter out of bounds. Wow again.

The RayRay haters are frothing on the Inter-Web. And Jim is about to pop a vein. But then he always looks that way. He won't last long in this league with that kind of emotion and energy being constantly expended... just ask the original Chucky, Jon Gruden.

Baltimore wins, 34-31.