It is not for the players, who don't need my help with anything.
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| courtesy of Just Deon |
Date site scammers normally fall into established categories. Here are a few characters you may come across, though this list isn't exhaustive. It is similar to comedian Jeff Foxworthy's "you might be a redneck" routine.. but not as funny.
The Vagabond. If a woman invites you out of the dating site in her very first message to you, be cautious. Some are even more bold: Watch for the women who put something like "let me hear from you at penny (at) smiley man face" in the body of their profiles. Ask yourself why she's trying to get you away from the date site moderators, who don't welcome scammers. They're trying to run businesses.
Did her profile disappear after you followed her over to Yahoo! or Skype? Ask her why. Don't listen to any "I deleted my profile because you're the one" nonsense. No one reasonable would do that. Tip: Use your dating site's email for a few weeks. The "true" women usually will write you there as long as you like.
The Honeypot. If the photos she sends at the start include lots of bikini-wearing poses, keep your cool. See a lot of vacation, lounging by the pool, and girls' night out fashionista pics? Unless money is no object to you, this is a potential danger zone. Don't count on having found a sugar mama; more likely, she'll be looking to you to fund further explorations.
Also, consider that this woman may need a lot of attention. She's gorgeous, outgoing, a head-turner, the kind of lady that even little boys and old men crush on? Then ask yourself if you can give her attention in the precise measurements she will need. Tip: Those flush with cash or who adventure-seek will adore a Honeypot. The rest of the reasonable men should tread with caution.
The Damsel. If she's always ill or having problems, and she asks for your help, you should need little reason to back away. Specifically, your financial aid. She wants medicine, passport, rent, etc.. the possibilities are endless. Even if she's genuine about her issues, you may not want to take them on.
Think about it: anyone who appears on a dating/marriage site, and dumps her problems on someone she doesn't really know, should be viewed with suspicion. Even a request for small amounts need to be refused. The first time you Western Union money to that sweetheart of a Ukranian, after two weeks of contact, you have opened a door to hell. Tip: Anyone who requests you send her funds, sight unseen, should be left behind like a house on fire. When you do find the One, the two of you will need that money. So save it now.
When you feel a connection, whether through texts, phone, video, or real life, it can be difficult to let go. Some men have a "If I lose her, I'll never find another one" mentality. But it's dangerous to think that way when the woman is hundreds or thousands of miles away. This is one area where the player-dog type can teach the honest man a lesson: don't get attached too quickly. Because you never know who that person is, on the other end.
How to Meet Your Digital Sweetheart in Person
